Part one:
Life is a journey of self-love. In the search for your essence, you will find Love.
Self-love is the foundation of any meaningful and fulfilling life. It is a journey that begins with understanding yourself, recognizing your worth, and learning to accept and appreciate your unique qualities. It is about embracing your strengths and weaknesses, understanding and honoring your emotional needs, and respecting and honoring yourself.
As you move forward on this journey, you will learn to express your true feelings and desires, and discover how to create healthy relationships and a lifestyle that honors your authentic self.
Ultimately, the journey of self-love leads to a life of peace, joy, and love.
My first steps to "success"
My healing journey started with my strong desire to create a life circumstance that reflects my true self and makes me feel joyful and satisfied on a daily basis. One day in my early twenties I googled "how can I become successful" and I found many books providing tools for this purpose. The biggest impact was Brian Tracy, who made me realize the simple truth:
If I wanna be successful I have to change myself. I started to read more books to learn how to change my thought patterns and build up a constructive belief system. Through my studies, I find that my belief system was based on a victim mindset which kept me back from thriving. I started to build up productive daily routines and behavior, and also the whole view of my world begin slowly shifting.
The result of applying the technics of these self-help books made me realize that the driving wheel of my life is in my own hands.
What were those techniques?
I read something positive and motivational every day and I was writing my journal regularly.
I then started to practice self-care, such as yoga and meditation, to center my thoughts and become mindful of my feelings and behaviors. I also took walks in nature, which really helped me to get grounded and release stress.
I have been practicing gratitude daily writing down things I felt grateful for, which has been a powerful tool in helping me to heal and move forward. I found that when I focus on the things that I am grateful for, my mindset shifts, and I am able to approach life with greater positivity.
I wrote down my goals and I made an action plan to achieve them. I did what I could, with that what I had, and at the place where I was.
Beginnings
My first goal was to study at the best university in Hungary, and even when nobody believed in me I achieved it. All we need is trust in ourselves.
My second goal was to rent an apartment closer to the university and soon I find an amazing opportunity which was an unbelievably good deal at that time.
All the goals I set become my reality in a short period of time including winning Miss Universe in Hungary.
Everything I touched turned to gold I was happy and excited and miracles filled my days.
I felt blessed and grateful but I always had times when sadness take over my body which felt like a disconnection from my soul.
I felt like it was my responsibility to guide the people in my life on to their successful path, and soon I learned we don't teach with words we can only lead by example.
I was achieving success on the outside but I often felt empty and detached on the inside.
My self-worth started to be based on my achievements in the outside world. I believe we only learned to love ourselves to the content our parents loved themselves. Evolution is to break old patterns and create new ones based on love and respect within us. I think the pattern of the generation before us was to please the outside world even if it comes with sacrificing their inner happiness. This has to change and we need to prioritize creating a life that makes our heart smile and gives us joy and peace in the first place. We can only share what we are so when we are happy and at one with ourselves, we can spread this vibe with the world.
So I was living my dream life on the outside and traveling the world as a queen but on the inside, I was more and more detached.
The solution didn't come from the outside world or from books. It is already written in our heart deep within and to find it I needed to create my own way.
Looking within
In 2019 I started my spiritual journey by isolating myself. I started to reconnect with nature and spend time outside in the forest where I could be alone. I begin to practice breath work - I used my breath to bring me into a deeper state of relaxation. I also practiced mindfulness and brought my awareness to the sensations in my body, allowing myself to be present at the moment. I simply observed my thoughts or feelings without judgment or attachment. I stayed in this space for as long as I needed, allowing my soul to be heard and to connect with the deeper parts of myself.
I did meditation every day and soon I felt my consciousness expanding.
This is how my real success started to unfold I felt peace and ease and inner joy. I found the connection which made me whole.
In the second part of my spiritual journey, I will describe how meditation affected my life and also experimenting with Ayahuasca changed me.
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